Read page 67.
There is more written work to do on our resentment list. There are eight questions to answer, covering the following areas:
(1) Mistakes
(2) Selfishness
(3) Dishonesty
(4) Self-seeking
(5) Fear
(6) Blame
(7) Faults
(8) Wrongs
‘Mistakes’ are where my beliefs, thinking, and behavior were wrong. What were my mistakes? What should I have believed, thought, and done instead? (the following may help – https://www.1st164steps.com/page-67-mistakes/)
‘Selfishness’ is where I put my interests above yours. Where was I selfish?
‘Dishonesty’ is lying, withholding the truth, distortion, or self-delusion. Where was I dishonest?
‘Self-seeking’ is what I am after. What was I after? (Refer to the third column: this contains the full answer; summarize it briefly here.)
‘Fear’ is where I am troubled because I think I am going to lose something I have got or not get something I want. What was I frightened of?
‘Blame’ is where my behavior contributed to a bad situation. Where was I to blame?
‘Faults’ are defects of character—this forms the basis for Step 7. Pick the top three. Using one of the following two lists may help – https://www.1st164steps.com/defects-7-deadly-sins/ or https://www.1st164steps.com/defects-simple-version/
Here is a simple list to pick from. Use a dictionary or ask an AA friend if you do not understand one or more of these.
Arrogance; avarice; contempt; cowardice; cruelty; disobedience; distrust; domination; envy; gluttony; impenitence; indifference; jealousy; lack of discipline; lust; malice; over-ambition; over-sensitiveness; presumption; pride; prudery; pugnacity; retaliation; sentimentality; shame (hurt pride); sloth; snobbery; timidity; vanity; violation of confidence; wastefulness.
Further, fuller lists of character defects are available in the program folder in documents starting with ‘STEP 06’.
‘Wrongs’ are harms I have done others—this forms the basis for Step 8. What were my wrongs?
On the back of each sheet of paper from the resentment inventory, write about each of these eight areas, covering the whole relationship in question, not just the situation that triggered the resentment.
Avoid repetition. Not every question will have an answer. The eight questions overlap in terms of the answers they elicit.
Check it’s complete by asking yourself: do my answers cover everything I’m getting wrong in belief, thought, and action (including speech)? If you’ve missed anything, add it. Then you’re done.